When are you getting married?
How do you feel when people ask you that question?
There was a time when my dad would ask me that at least once a month. I became so angry one time, that I yelled through the phone, "WHO AM I GOING TO MARRY?" I didn't mean to become so upset, but he had touched a nerve. I was simply tired of hearing that question — from him, my sister, my grandmothers, family friends, friends who were married.
I was frustrated and hurt. It made me feel like a failure that I had not met anyone who thought enough of me to want to spend the rest of their life with me. I mean, how am I suppose to answer that question? What am I suppose to say? Sometimes I would be flip and say something sassy like, "oh, tomorrow, you should come."
But it's not like I can go in Whole Foods, pick the guy I want and walk out the store.
It's not that simple.
Well, after my little outburst my dad promised that he wouldn't ask me that anymore and he hasn't. It's interesting. We talk about marriage, relationships, men, all the time now. But he has kept his promise.
So I ask:
How do you respond when someone asks, "When are you getting married?"
Do you get offended?
How do you feel?
Do you think it's a rude question?
Let me know your thoughts.
About Me
- Lottie
- This blog is about love, love in all its forms. Well, it's actually more about relationships and not just of the romantic kind. It's about our relationship with ourselves, our family, our friends, co-workers and just about anyone else we come into contact with on a near daily basis. The ellipsis in the title is important. It represents all the stuff you do before you get to love and all the stuff you put up with because of love. The ellipsis represents relationship. So this blog will not only be about my quest to be in a loving, kind, committed and fulfilling relationship but it will also provide examples of relationships — through media stories, videos, music and art. I also want to encourage you to contribute examples of relationships or love as you see it.
3 comments:
my family's a bit ruder. they say, "you're never getting married; you're too old!" it used to infuriate me, hurt my feelings, bring me to tears. hmm... i guess it still does. i try to avoid the worst offenders.
I had the same kind of outburst with my dad. He was instructed by stepmother never to ask that again and he hasn't. I get extremely offended. I think it is just the most insensitive thing to ask a woman.
I used to get upset about that before I got married. But I think the question that bugs me even more is when people asked "When are you going to have a baby?" I don't think anyone has any business asking me that whether I'm married or not. The most interesting thing about it is that I was asked that question more often before I got married than after! Go figure!
Post a Comment