Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Proposal

Last night on the VH1 reality show, Love and Hip Hop, Jim Jones' longtime love Chrissy proposed to the New York rapper. Chrissy had confided in her friend, singer Olivia that she and Jim had been together six years and she was ready for marriage and children.

As Chrissy picked out Jim's ring, she asked the jeweler about her decision: Do you think I'm a nut job for doing this?

"Sometimes we need a little push," the jeweler reasoned. "If we don't get a push, we can't get it done."

But Chrissy was still a little hesitant: He hasn't asked you, she told herself, maybe cause he's not ready.

Nevertheless, she cleaned out her "cookie jar" of savings and bought Jim's ring (and even looked at one for herself) saying defiantly, "He's worth it."

So in front of his family and friends, she did the damn thing:
"It's taken me a long time to figure out exactly what I wanted to do with my life. I want to spend it with you," Chrissy said through tears as she presented Jim with a ring. "Will you Marry me?"

Check out Chrissy's proposal below:

I love Chrissy's spirit. She's sassy. She's tough. And she goes for what she wants.
But I don't know if I would propose to a guy.

So a few questions:
1) What about you? Would you propose to a guy?

2) What if he was a GREAT catch and you didn't want to lose him?

3) What if you had been dating a long time (more than 5 years) and really wanted to get married? Would you take the initiative and give him that "little push"?

4) Just because a guy hasn't proposed, does it mean he doesn't want to marry you?

Let me know your thoughts.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Edward - Part II

My phone rang yesterday afternoon.

“Hello,” I said.

“Why haven’t I heard from you,” the caller demanded.

“Who is this?” I asked.

“This Edward. You took my number out your phone?”

As you recall, I met Edward last Monday at Au Bon Pain. I didn't save his number in my phone, which is why I didn't recognize it.

“So, what’s up? Why haven’t I heard from you?” he asked again.

“Girls, don’t call boys,” I explained.

“First of all, I’m a man,” Edward said. “And baby you need to get off that theory."

“Well, a MAN is suppose to court a woman,” I explained patiently.

“I don’t chase, baby,” he said.

“Chase?” I said. (Did I say chase?)

Then he went into his spiel:
“It’s 10 to 1 out here, so why would I chase any woman?
For everyone I lose, I gain 4.

“You need to get out of that pride thing and get with the program baby.
Men sitting at home chilling; women working all day and paying the bills.”

I interrupted him: “That’s not me.”

But he continued:
“You got an official dude right here and don’t know what to do with him.
I’m official like a referee whistle. I ain’t one of these clowns.
I handle my business. I’ll take you, spoil you, show you love. But I got to feel the love. I got to know you interested.

Edward wasn’t finished:
“I turn down women everyday. I mess with who I want to mess with.
I don’t play games. I see something. I go get it. I keep it 100.

“I know you probably got a lot of dudes chasing you. I can expect that.
All I care about is how you treat me.”

Then he got me upset:
“A lot of dudes, man sometimes I don’t know who’s wearing the pants and who wearing the skirts.
We suppose to be kings out here, but some dudes acting like princesses.
There ain’t never been a woman at the White House and it ain’t never gone be one either.”

I had had enough.

“I gotta go,” I said.

“When can I see you?” Edward asked.

“Call me Sunday.”

LOL – I know it sounds crazy. I know Edward is a chauvinistic little thug, but he amuses me.

Plus, he’s great fodder for my blog.

Any thoughts on what Edward said?

Friday, April 15, 2011

Love Story

I knew a man had to be involved.

I mean, when a woman decides to just up and leave - selling everything she owns including the clothes off her back - well, it must be love.

Or so she thinks.

Anyway, I attended a going away party last night for a friend who is moving to Ghana. She lost her job with the federal government in January, went to Ghana for a much-needed vacation and met a man.

Ahh, yes.

If there's one thing that can turn our lives around and upside down, it's a man- "a FINE man," she told me. (lol)

Well, after three months of what must have been a whirlwind romance, she's ditching D.C. and heading to Africa. She plans to live with her new love temporarily until she gets her business set up and moves into her own place.

I stared at her long and hard last night. She beamed as she greeted each guest and danced until nearly everyone had left. She looked so HAPPY- absolutely radiant! And why shouldn't she? She's living the life she wants - my kinda hero.

I know this sounds like some kind of Terry McMillan novel or even one of those tearjerker love stories. But I Love the fact that she's writing her own story.

I wish her well. I wish her luck. I wish her LOVE.

Tell me: Would you move across the world to be with a man you had only known for three months?

What are your thoughts?

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

What Up Shawty?

On Monday evening I walked into the Au Bon Pain deli in downtown D.C. to get a cool drink. I wanted to sit outside and enjoy the nice weather before getting on the metro to meet a friend.

While picking up a straw and a few napkins, a young man came up to me.

"I would love to take you out to lunch," he said.

I looked at him. He looked young - late '20s maybe. He was extremely fair, slight build, maybe 5'8, 5'9. He had on gray acid-washed jeans, a tan vest with a white t-shirt underneath and some sneakers. A cross of Jesus Christ hung from his neck.

"Why?" I asked.

"Why?" he said, looking taken aback.

"Yeah, why. Why do you want to take me out to lunch?" I said, looking him in the eye.

"Because you're a beautiful young lady," he shot back.

"How old are you?" I asked.

"38," he said.

38? He looked really young. Maybe it was the way he dressed.

"What's your name?" I asked him.

"Edward," he said, stirring his coffee.

Edward followed me to the table outside and sat beside me while I drank my cool drink.

"So, can I take you out?" he asked again.

"I don't know. Are you married?" I said smiling.

He smiled, "no."

He had yellow teeth, so I asked him if he smoked. No, he said. "I don't smoke and I only drink socially."

Hmmm, I thought. It was either bad hygiene or bad grooming.

Anyway, we talked a little bit more. I found out Edward had 2 kids by a girl he had dated for 10 years — a girl and a boy, one 13, one 14.

"Why didn't you marry her?" I asked.

"You not suppose to get married just because you have kids," he said.

"But you were with her for 10 years," I said.

"Yeah, but I met her when I was real young," he pointed out.

He works as a marketing manager for a company that sells tubs for those with medical problems. He was off today taking care of business in family court.

I stared at his gray acid-washed jeans.

"You like my jeans," he said. "They cost $300."

"You need to get your money back," I said.

He laughed.

"So, can I take you to lunch," he asked again.

"I don't know," I said, the more I learned about him the less I liked him. But I remained opened. Who knows? He could really be a nice person.

"I'm gonna call you tonite - 9 p.m.," he said as he put my number in his phone.

Well, Edward called me at 10. I was in a metro station heading home.

This was his rap:
him - "I've been thinking about you all night."
me - Really, I said.
him - "Yeah. I was thinking about why you didn't have a man. Because you know, your body official and everything, so you must have a bad attitude."
(okay yall, excuse me if I'm not up on my hip hop slang, but what the hell is "official").
me - Silence
him - "I think you a player. But I'm gonna take care of that."
me - Really? How?
him - "See, when a woman's with me, she gets addicted. I'm addictive."
me - Silence.

The phone went dead. The call must have dropped. Good thing, because I don't know how much more I could have taken of Edward's conversation.

I haven't heard from him since. Guess, we're not gonna do lunch.