Sunday, September 30, 2012

Lil'Pimp Big Dogg Baby Daddy

I was ready to get off my online dating site after someone named "ain't studdin' u" sent me a flirt. I checked to see how long I had left on my subscription. I was hoping that it ended at the end of this month, but it doesn't. I have five more months of this foolishness.

It seems that I've been on the site a long time, but it's only been a month. The good thing is you get a lot of flirts. The bad thing is they're usually from people you're not interested in — you know, like men who are 63, who could be my father's friends.

So let me vent for a few minutes.

Dude, if you have the words - "pimp", "dog," "courvosier," or "baby daddy" as part of your screen name, I'm not responding to you no matter how many messages you send me.

Also, I'm tired of reading stuff like this:
"I'm looking for a quality woman. A quality woman would Google my band, listen to my music and leave a comment on my website."
"I have a closet full of AirForce One's and linen suits for the summer."
"I am not looking for a woman who is not attractive. I'm not settling because I dont have to, the best or nothing."
"I believe in taking good care of my woman with money, so she can ever be looking good for me."
or this: 
"Is it possible if I can talk to you and become friends with you? Mother May I? I'd like to keep in touch with you. Bye, Bye."
No joke.

But I have to respect the honesty that some guys put forth like this one: "My first priority is to obtain gainful employment....the other priority is to cultivate a relationship with you." 
Yeah, I'm glad he's got his priorities straight.

And if I see one more in-front-of-the-bathroom-mirror-with-no-shirt-on camera phone photo, I'm gonna scream. Listen, go to a park and ask some strangers (a family member or a close friend) to take your picture — pose in front of some trees or water or something. It's not that hard. I promise.

I don't want to get discouraged, though it's tempting. But like my friend says, it only takes one. But geez, how many of these do I have to go through to meet that "one"?

holla at me... 

Friday, September 28, 2012

Usher on Oprah

Did yall see Usher's interview with Oprah on the OWN channel a few weeks ago? If not, the full interview is below. Check it out and let me know what you think.

Oprah's Next Chapter | Usher (FULL EPISODE) by Ashley_Miller_3

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Something Better

About a few weeks ago, before my tv went out, I was watching an episode of Lovetown USA on the OWN channel. The show is about how two matchmakers go into the town of Kingsland, Ga. and try to match up singles — you know, find them love.

It was interesting. Two of the single men who had been matched — one White, one Black — seemed really into the women that were chosen for them. They had gone out on several dates with their matches and expressed that they liked them a lot. They said that they enjoyed spending time with the ladies and had fun on their dates.


When the matchmakers asked the men if they wanted to continue to date the women they were matched with, get to know them and see if maybe a relationship could develop or try someone new — they both opted to try someone new and be matched with someone else.

When asked why, both men gave the same response: She's nice and all. I really like her, but I want to see what else is out there.

So, both men were matched with different women. Ironically, they did not enjoy themselves with their new matches and one even admitted that he would have had more fun with his original match.

The matchmakers had warned them that they could risk losing a good partner in search of "something better," and it seemed that in the end both men regretted their decision.

I think the lesson in this is obvious.

I know none of us wants to feel like we've "settled" but what are the consequences of always looking for something better, of thinking that there's something better out there.

What are your thoughts?
Have you run into guys (wait a minute, I should say women too) who can't seem to settle down because they're always looking for "something better"?

holla at me...

Monday, September 24, 2012

My Heart is an Idiot

If my life was a book, this would be the title for sure.

Tell me, if your life was a book, what would be the title?


Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Highly Educated

I was listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show this morning and he said something profound. He was giving a response to the "strawberry letter" which was about a woman who had a master's degree and wanted to know if she should get out of a relationship with a man she had outgrown.

In noting the number of highly educated women who wrote him about relationship problems, Steve said, "All yall got all these different degrees, but yall ain't got a degree in the right thing: How to pick a man."

I have to admit: I love school. I work hard at my job, but when it comes to men and relationships I suck! I do choose the wrong people and always end up sad and disappointed.

What about you? Can you relate?

Holla at me...

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Criminal Conversation

I learned a new term today: "criminal conversation," which, according to this article is the legal term for extramarital sex.

I like that term. It sounds so much more sophisticated than adultery.

I was actually reading a story on Black America Web about how Fantasia's baby daddy Antwuan Cook admitted that he cheated on his wife with the American Idol winner. If you recall, Cook's wife sued Fantasia for "alienation of affection."

So while looking up the term "alienation of affection," I came across "criminal conversation."

According to the website, an alienation of affection lawsuit is "one in which a deserted spouse can sue the alleged third party if his or her partner leaves the relationship for another person and causes the marital relationship to fail."

The site notes that as of 2003, you can sue for alienation of affection in eight states: Hawaii, Illinois, Mississippi, New Hampshire, New Mexico, North Carolina, South Dakota and Utah.


Anyway, the article says to win an alienation of affection suit, a spouse has to prove that:
 1) There was love in the marriage before the third party came in the picture
 2)  The marital love was "alienated and destroyed as a result of the relationship" with the third party
 3) The third party's conduct was "a malicious interference with the marital relationship."
The author of the article writes that a spouse only has to show that the "third party engaged in conduct that was foreseeable to impact the relationship in a negative manner."

You know, stuff like trips to the Bahamas, expensive gifts or criminal conversation.

holla at me...

Wednesday, September 12, 2012


I was watching The Wendy Williams Show this morning and she mentioned a star who is being bullied because the person is considered a homewrecker.

I looked up some definitions of "homewrecker."
Urban Dictionary:
5. "One who goes after a married individual; usually succeeds in ruining his/her marriage; takes married individual."
"A person who is blamed for the breakup of a marriage or family, esp. because of his or her affair with one of the partners."
"A person (male or female) who engages in romantic relations with a person who is married or engaged to be married with the result of breaking up the engagement or marriage."
So, I had just one question:
Can a person ruin or break up a HAPPY home?
My co-worker always tells me that it takes two to tango.

holla at me...

Monday, September 10, 2012

Legally Separated

That means you're not divorced right?
A few men have contacted me on Black People Meet that have described their status as "legally separated."
I'm like wth?

Dude, get divorced first then maybe we could communicate.

But then you have to think: If you're separated, does that mean you're not suppose to date for one or two years or however long it takes to get a divorce?

Should people wait until their divorce is final before they begin to get back out there and date again?

I know a guy whose wife left him in 2010. She moved to a different state. His divorce wasn't final until February of this year, but I know he was dating someone last year. He brought her to D.C. and I met her.

So is a person suppose to be alone until the ink dries on the divorce papers? They're not suppose to meet other folks and go out on dates — right? He should just hang with the fellas until everything is done, finished, complete — maybe visit some massage parlors (just kidding).

What yall think?

Holla at me...