Huh? What?

So I went out with Big Red last night. I was running errands when he sent me a text:"Hey babe."

"My name is Lottie," I replied.

He texted: "I know babe. what ya doin'? wanna meet later?"

I couldn't help but smile: "sure," I replied.

He sent another text: "What do you want to do?"

I suggested we see a movie. I was in a shopping center that included a theater. I told him I could meet him at 9, around the time I had expected to finish my shopping. He agreed.

As the time got closer for us to meet, he sent me a text to let me know he was on his way.

Well, I had not eaten since early afternoon and was starving. Plus, I was tired after running around all day and didn't want to risk falling asleep in a movie. So I suggested we go to a nearby restaurant in the same shopping center instead of catching a movie.

He sent me a text indicating that it was okay.

I was still in the store when he text to tell me he had made it to the restaurant. It was four minutes until 9.

Wow, I thought. Big Red is punctual.

I met him at the restaurant. He was not hard to find. His car definitely stood out among the rest — LOL.

Now, since meeting we had never had a phone conversation. We had only text each other.

We were now sitting face to face and had to talk.

Well, I couldn't understand a damn word Big Red said. In fact, I kept repeating what he said to make sure that I had it right.

I was like: Huh? What?

I don't remember his words being so mumbled the first time I met him. When we met, we danced and he bought me a drink. Afterwards he walked me to my car and we talked a little bit. But I swear I could understand him.

But last night was a different story.

Where are you from? I asked. I had noticed an accent.

It seemed like a simple question. But I didn't get a straightforward answer: My father is African and my mother is from the Bahamas.

oh, okay, I said.

But you know I was in Haiti a lot, he said.

Haiti?

Yeah.

And sometimes Miami.

Huh?

My father owns funeral homes in Haiti and my mother lives in Miami now.

Oh, gotcha. Now where did he grow up?

Anyway, I kept straining to understand his words. I didn't have any alcohol. But I did have alcohol the night I met him: vodka and cranberry. Maybe he just sounded clearer when I was under the influence - LOL.

Anyway, after dinner Big Red wanted to go out. He was ready to party after being inside all day. But I was dead tired.

Maybe next time, I said.

He walked me to my car and we said our goodbyes.

When Big Red called me this afternoon, again I couldn't quite make out his words. He was just getting up (it was 2 pm) and wanted to know if we could get together sometime today.

Then it hit me. I realized who he sounded like: LIL WAYNE ! WEEZY !!!

In fact, he even looks a bit like Weezy, a spitting image: dark-complexion, short, extremely thin and long locs.

I'm dating Lil Wayne yall !!!!




thoughts?