That means you're not divorced right?
A few men have contacted me on Black People Meet that have described their status as "legally separated."
I'm like wth?
Dude, get divorced first then maybe we could communicate.
But then you have to think: If you're separated, does that mean you're not suppose to date for one or two years or however long it takes to get a divorce?
Should people wait until their divorce is final before they begin to get back out there and date again?
I know a guy whose wife left him in 2010. She moved to a different state. His divorce wasn't final until February of this year, but I know he was dating someone last year. He brought her to D.C. and I met her.
So is a person suppose to be alone until the ink dries on the divorce papers? They're not suppose to meet other folks and go out on dates — right? He should just hang with the fellas until everything is done, finished, complete — maybe visit some massage parlors (just kidding).
What yall think?
Holla at me...
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4 comments:
In short, yes...
Realistically, this doesn't necessarily work. If a person's marriage is over emotionally before a divorce decree is granted, marriage at that point is only a legal matter. Either or both parties have moved on from each other. In some states, you have to be separated for at least a year before you can even file for a divorce. Then the divorce may take several months to a year to be granted. The situation is more complicated if there is marital property and children involved. I don't think I could date a legally separated person; however, I can understand the separated person's stance on dating before the divorce is final. They wouldn't be dating me, though. Too messy of a situation. But separated folks need love, too. I guess. In regards to having a status of legally separated on dating websites, um no. Those dudes are living with their wives. They are as much separated as she is upstairs sleep and he is downstairs in the office picking up women online. No, sir.
I used to be hardline on this until I was in this situation and now I would say take it on a case-by-case basis.
As the other poster said, sometimes the marriage is over long before the paperwork is finalized and other times folks are playing.
If legally separated, they should be allowed to date and move forward with their lives.
I would not date anyone who is legally separated, especially online. To me adultry is adultry, even legally separated. Not a gray area for me, I'm very black and white on that one.
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