Before I get into my weekend news, I wanted to ask if anyone had seen the new Black reality TV shows on VH1 last night. Let's see: There was A Family Business, singers Brandy and Ray Js' new show with their parents, Basketball Wives produced by Shaquille O'Neal's ex-wife Shaunie (are they divorced yet?) and What Chilli Wants, featuring Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas from the famed '90s group TLC, looking for her soul mate (what do you think of her Checklist?). And last Thursday, LisaRaye's (of The Player's Club and All of Us fame) new reality show, The Real McCoy, debuted on TV One.
My guilty pleasure is Reality TV and that's a whole lotta TV (lol).
So, on to the news: Remember the blog I wrote a few weeks ago about a 43-year-old guy I met online who, after the first date, would call me early in the a.m., text me several times a day and declared that he wanted me to be his girlfriend (after only one date)? Well, I learned this weekend that he's been talking marriage with another young lady he met online.
Now, I don't know when they met online, but since our first and only date last month, this dude has continued to call and text me. In fact, last weekend he text me, "I Miss You! When Can I See You?" Then he called to see if he could bring flowers to my office — that never happened. This past weekend he called me about 4 times on Friday, a few times on Saturday and at least twice yesterday on Sunday, still declaring that he wanted to make me his girlfriend ("I'm trying to get with you"). I still have the text messages from this weekend, "hope you do well on your test", "missing you" and "thinking about us."
Now, from what I understand, this other young lady is serious about this guy and believes he is "the one." She's seriously considering marrying him. He's obviously swept her off her feet. Remember, he's very good at compliments. On our first date, he couldn't stop telling me how much he liked my hair or how he thought I was so beautiful. He keeps asking me to go to New York with him (he's from Brooklyn) or take a train ride down to Mississippi (he works for Amtrak). And ends each phone call with, "I miss you" (after only one date?). I usually say nothing. Recently he asked if I was interested in having children. He thinks I'll be a good mother. On Saturday evening he confessed, "We just have this connection."
Really? (Why didn't I feel it?)
Anyway, I wonder how many other "connections" old dude has.
I'm not into this guy at all, but this young lady is. Unfortunately, he's playing games — with hearts. That's not cool. You don't do that.
I haven't heard from him today. I wonder if she confronted him - or if she even knows.
What do you think is up with this guy?
Do you think he's just trolling online sites to see who will bite?
How would you feel if you found out that someone you wanted to marry was doing this? What would you do?
jeez...
About Me
- Lottie
- This blog is about love, love in all its forms. Well, it's actually more about relationships and not just of the romantic kind. It's about our relationship with ourselves, our family, our friends, co-workers and just about anyone else we come into contact with on a near daily basis. The ellipsis in the title is important. It represents all the stuff you do before you get to love and all the stuff you put up with because of love. The ellipsis represents relationship. So this blog will not only be about my quest to be in a loving, kind, committed and fulfilling relationship but it will also provide examples of relationships — through media stories, videos, music and art. I also want to encourage you to contribute examples of relationships or love as you see it.
8 comments:
How did you find out about this other lady and why don't you say something to him? You have absolutely nothing to lose by confronting him. You don't like him, so just ask him how it is he thinks that he can be sooooo into two - if that's all there is -- women at once? And if he's playing a game. I think you should just ask him straight out. Bet he'll stop calling and texting you then.
Why are you still communicating with this fool?
He is running game.
A plan is about to take place to confront this troll. Believe that! The other girl will know soon enough. You don't play with people's emotions. NOT COOL. Lottie is a very strong woman and more women need to be like her. Including myself. DC is so small and you never know who knows who. I would be utterly hurt if a guy I was considering marrying was communicating with another woman and expressing feelings for her, too! Ugh....
What's very interesting is how this guys looks to a woman who is very... ready to get married and not as cautious. My friend (the other lady) is READY and she doesn't see this guy as stalkerish at all. In fact, she thinks that things line up PERFECTLY. I am in a tough spot, as I have already expressed my dissatisfaction with her moving so fast with this guy by talking marriage already. So I look like the single girlfriend that's HATING. I have this info and need to get it to her gingerly, but get it to her nevertheless, as this guy is a con artist!!
I would've cut him loose after he started acting like a stalker after only one date. You ARE wonderful and deserving of accolades and praise, but someone doing that to you after one date is doing the same to every woman he meets online.
Um. First, Chilli lost me when she laid out her list of (superficial IMO) "must haves" and "no more than two baby mamas" was on it. Do better.
As for the other situ...it sounds like a mess and you shouldn't be tangled up in it. Not sure why you are still in contact with this guy as he sounded crazy as all get out, but let the friend on here posting deal with the other young lady. If she doesn't want to listen, she will have to take her lumps. Hopefully she will listen to her friend.
Note from the other woman: Dumped the guy, still stunned but reading about forgiveness in the Bible has helped. Talked to him today and wished him the best of luck. I explained to him he didn't really love me because when he found love he wouldn't need a backup. Not going to let him rock my basic faith in the goodness of people or myself. Thanks to Lottie and Tri Becca for the info.
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